


Not Today, Not Yet...

by Fandoms_R_Fun



Series: The Sad Stuff [4]
Category: Life Is Strange (Video Game)
Genre: Bittersweet Ending, Mental Health Issues, Trans Victoria Chase
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-23
Updated: 2020-12-23
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:08:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28260663
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fandoms_R_Fun/pseuds/Fandoms_R_Fun
Summary: Victoria has some fleeting thoughts while she's alone.
Series: The Sad Stuff [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1313111
Kudos: 3





	Not Today, Not Yet...

**Author's Note:**

> WARNING: Mentions of suicidal thoughts.
> 
> For those who are experiencing mental health issues or have thoughts of suicide or self-harm, there are people out there who care for you and who are willing to help. If you need to call someone, day or night, you can reach out to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at : 1-800-273-8255

I hold my head in my hands, feeling the sweat and tears mix together in small, thin lines running down my cheek. I feel my nails digging into my scalp and pulling at the roots of my hair. I can feel my heart aching in my chest, the pains growing stronger and my eyes throbbing.

_Why should I keep Fucking trying?_

I let my nails drag down my skin, feeling the sting as the skin is scraped away and little chunks of hair stick under my nails. I can feel the warmth of small spots of blood coming up in the scratches, stinging and teasing me to embrace the warmth and keep scraping away more.

_What could I fucking do for anyone...?_

I let my hands drop to the desk, my eyes closed as I take slow, deep breaths.

_It's not like they wouldn't be able to get over it..._

I slowly reach down, pressing my hand into the handle, squeezing it firmly but making sure not to touch the wrong thing, slowly raising it and pressing the cold metal to my head.

_I could do it, right here, right now. I could just do some simple movement and I'd never fuck up anything again..._

I know where the trigger is, so close to my finger as it rests in a safe place right next to it. I take a few deep breaths, opening my eyes and lowering my hand.

_Not today. I can't do it, not when I have people who care about me that I would hurt. Not when I still have to do something good in this world. Not today._

I slowly slide the gun into it's case in my desk drawer, closing the lid and taking the drawer handle, holding it and looking down at the small, black box that holds so much power over the lives of me and those close to me.

I let out a shuddering breath, sitting up a little straighter.

_Not today, now when there's so much let to do._

_Not today, not when there are so many others I could hurt._

_Not today._

_Not yet..._

**Author's Note:**

> On a lighter note from the above work: for those who are readers of mine seeing this when it is new: I would have posted something sooner but my draft that was PAGES long got automatically deleted cause I waited too long so I got annoyed and life got busy.
> 
> Anyways, I have a little more free time for the next few weeks and I'll try to get the patience together to remake what I was going to post and put it out there for you guys. (it's going to be wholesome and [mostly] happy ChaseMarsh.)


End file.
